Sample Edits with Track Changes

Here one of the sample edits with Track Changes:

Starting with the first chapter, Strauss attempts to retell the story of the Trojan War, in its entirety. He begins by introducing Helen herself, portraying a very romanticized and artistic vision of the “face that launched a thousand ships.” He takes care to note that Helen is not just beautiful, but very clever as well, and reasons suggests that Helen and Paris most likely ran away together for more practical reasons than just love. By taking Helen, Paris was able to execute a strategic political move against Menelaus, whereas Helen knew she would have been much more respected in the cosmopolitan Troy than in Greece, assures Strauss[O1] . Thus the Trojan War was not really started because of the foolishness of young love and a husband scorned, but instead for political means. As Strauss explains it, “Helen was not the cause but merely the occasion of the war” (Strauss 28).

             


 [O1]Comment: You might want to reword this sentence for clarity.  Perhaps:  Even though Helen knew she would have been much more respected in the cosmopolitan Troy than in Greece, she permits Paris to use her in a strategic political move against Menelaus.

The comment suggests a rewording to clarify the sentence. This wording is not the most succinct possible, but it is in keeping with the author’s voice and style. Such a suggested rewording would not be offered in student papers. We would merely suggest rewording for clarity and leave it to the student to decide how to reword the sentence.

If the author feels his or her style is too wordy and tasks us with tightening up the document regardless of his or her style, we will do so. The scope of the work desired is completely up to the author. At Tantamount, we work closely with our clients to ensure they are getting exactly the type of editing assistance they desire.

The citation style (last name and page number in parentheses with the final period outside the parentheses) was discussed with the author who confirmed that this was the proper format. At Tantamount we compile style sheets for all our authors. This ensures that preferences in punctuation  and citation format will be uniform throughout the document and all subsequent projects from that author.

Another of the sample edits with Track Changes:

However, his writing style was isnot consistent enough to make the book or story easy to follow. He would haphazardly switches from rich imagery to dry historical explanation, causing the reader to frequently get lost. It is as if he could not cannot decide whether he wanted wants to write a beautiful novel or a historical account of a non-fictitious war. It was is this conflict in style and theme that very likely leads to Strauss’ failure at to sufficiently validating validate the Trojan War.

This final edit is not strictly necessary. We consider it a stylistic choice which makes the sentence easier to read. The author can ignore this edit and leave it as is. Most authors like these stylistic edits because it affords them the opportunity for change if they so desire.  

For this reason, you should go through the red-lined version edit by edit and either accept or reject them. If you do not have time to do that, you can also receive a clean version with all the edits accepted for a small additional fee. Again, we must reiterate that we recommend looking at all edits made to either accept or reject them.

If you dislike the red-line feature of Word, other editing arrangements can be made; but such arrangements must be made prior to the commencement of editing.

The last of the sample edits with Track Changes:

As previously mentioned, Strauss set sets the stage for a very compelling argument right away in his introduction. However, in the following chapters, he got gets so caught up in retelling the story that it seems that he almost completely forgot forgets that he was is trying to prove a point. And he completely dropped drops his case in the conclusion, which would have been the perfect forum for solidifying the arguments that he had been trying tries to make throughout the rest of the book.

These last two samples show a common mistake in tense. When reviewing or discussing a book, it is considered correct to use the present tense. This exemplifies Tantamount proofreading services. This is the lowest level of service and is all that is needed in these last two examples. There is no reason to pay for editing when you only need proofreading. 

This final example also shows that the grammar checking function in Word can be wrong. It determined that Strauss is plural and suggests “set” instead of “sets” in the first paragraph.

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